Who is/was Simon Woodstock?
April 30th, 2007 by Kilwag
I can’t find much about Simon Woodstock on the web. There are a couple of reviews of his religious tract disguised as a zine, but other than that, just this video clip, Skim the Fat doesn’t have a single listing of him, even if IMDB lists him as appearing in Boob. STF lists 154 skaters in that video, but no Simon Woodstock. It’s like he’s been blacklisted. Simon was in the limelight at a time when I wasn’t following the industry rags, not that I am now, but through the Interweb™ I sometimes find out about things whether I want to or not. I remember reading about some legendary shenanigans and talented skating in the past tense. What I get from this video is a heavy CKY vibe. Just as some people can’t stand Bam, there are lot of Woodstock bashers out there. You’d have to be blind to say he had no talent. Watch him ride both a skimboard and snowboard set up as skateboards while wearing appropriate attire and shredding as effortlessly as if he was riding a short board. Then there’s the clown suit. Funny stuff, but I can imagine it wears thin after a while. So someone fill in the blanks. Who did he ride for and what video is this from? Watch the vid and more after the jump.
Simon Woodstock video
Here it is. It’s damn funny and the skating is good. The user who is propagating it claims not to know where it is from.
This clip has the year 1993 attached to it. I don’t know if that’s accurate since IMDB says Simon was in Boob in 1999. No matter, cut to the year 2005. Madrid Skatebaords releases the El Cochino complete deck. The story as I remember it from Concrete Disciples is that Mark “Sumdumsurfer” Kessenich, a Madrid emplyee at the time, pressed a giant skateboard out of some birch plys that Madrid had stocked for their line of skimboards. This one had a kicktail and upturned nose. He outfitted it with some 13″ wide Gullwing trucks (for mountain boards), and brought it to a local skatepark as a goof. The locals reacted strongly in favor and demanded their own, so Madrid actually put them into a limited production. I don’t know if they had a bulletin board meltdown over at Concrete Disciple or what, because I can’t find the original “El Cochino” thread, but I did find this picture of it in action.
Nowhere Fast
Pretty much the only substantial information on Simon I could find was in this Jason Adams interview in Transworld. It’s like the all too familiar bipolar disorder. People tend to go from one extreme to the other. At some point in time Simon found God, and is now trying to make sure others find him too. He put out a publication called Nowhere Fast that, according to reviews, was not much more than a Chic tract disguised as a zine.
Here’s the January 2003 review of Nowhere Fast in Zine Thing, from Thrasher Magazine.
This is the work of former pro skater Simon Woodstock–you know, the guy who used to ride boogie boards or bowling balls with trucks at contests. Urifortunately, that’s where the good part ends. This is essentially a religious tract, in the same vein as those cheesy “You’re going to hell unless you repent now” comics from Chick Publications. Simon feels that his life was spiralling out of control, and he was “carousing” a bit too much, egged on by peer pressure and bad influences. Now the Lord is his latest in a string of influences, I guess. It’s funny and appropriate that the God squad now has a skateboarding clown on their team. Why can’t people just keep their beliefs to themselves? Remember this Biblical paradox when people try to pawn this stuff off on you. Only sheep need a shephard, and sheep are led to the slaughter. If you’re a glutton fur punishment or want a good chuckle, write the Calvary Chapel of San Jose, 1175 Hillsdale Ave, San Jose, CA 95118, or write to Simon directly: simon@calvarychapel.ch
Here’s another review on the Media Diet site.
This full-color pamphlet was written by Simon Woodstock, a former professional skateboarder who was active for seven years in the ’90s. Now he’s found God and a new calling — evangelizing to the youth set. This eight-page almost-zine, which was largely dismissed by the mainstream skateboarding magazines, outlines Woodstock’s self-realization. For the most part, his religious growth stemmed from falling prey to the party lifestyle he engaged in while a pro skateboarder, which caused him to lose focus with his skating. While the pamphlet is full of photos of Woodstock skating, complete with dyed hair and clown suit, it’s unclear whether he kept up his skating — although it seems he couldn’t regain and maintain focus without giving up his skating career. While I’m glad Woodstock found renewed meaning in his life, I’m not sure his work with the chapel or this skater-oriented pamphlet will have the evangelical effect he’s hoping for. One, very few people in the skateboarding industry will take this seriously. Two, people interested in skateboarding in general will not know who Woodstock is. Now, if Tony Hawk were to come out as a vocal Christian, the church might have something to work with. Regardless, this is an interesting outgrowth of church culture and skateboarding fandom — and an intriguing parallel to Christian punk rock. It’s just a shame that stuff like this always starts with religion and then culture instead of the other way around. Following that path almost always results in watered-down culture. Free from Simon Woodstock, Calvary Chapel, 1175 Hillsdale Ave., San Jose, CA 95118.
Simon Woodstock, TrendPimp
I originally came across this video via a feed from a rediculous web site called TrendPimp. It was titled “The Worlds First Skateboard Skimboarding” which made me think it was recent until I realized who it was. Trend Pimp is so bad, like Details for the mentally impaired. Their tagline is “Defining Style.” Puh-lease. Defining style for retarded robots and adolescent fashion parrots is more like it. The only thing they have going for them is that their video compression is better than YouTube, and they let you vote on whether not the video is good, like that means a damn thing. It just encourages vanity and a false sense of self importance. Much like Skate and Annoy does for it’s contributors, actually, so look for that feature to be added here soon.
If you are going to comment on this post, please refrain from saying something dumb like “Bam Margera has no talent either” because besides being ludicrous, it’s just not interesting enough to read again.
UPDATE: Simon Woodstock on Vans trading card
Thanks to reader Jan who pointed out this Vans trading card from 1997. Check out how they list his ranking from 1996. Click to enlarge.
May 1st, 2007 at 1:29 am
http://www.skimthefat.com/provideos/showvideo.cgi?videoID=123672 Kilwag, i think this may help a little. I wish my fuzzy memories could help you more. I remember having an old video with him in it, but i know it had ‘normal’ footage of him skating. The guy killed it.
May 1st, 2007 at 1:53 am
i was there the day they filmed at that indoor park… it was in Sacramento (there were two.. one with a wood bowl called “The Grind”? which i think was moved twice… actually kickflipping that board was pretty amazing although we were kind of stunned on the wetsuit.
May 1st, 2007 at 2:09 am
He skated for sonic (i think amongst others) and also had an ill-fated wheel company called “woodstock wheel designs”… i never saw a set of wheels, but i still have one of their stickers on my fridge. it features a clown giving the thumbs up… surprise surprise.
May 1st, 2007 at 4:18 am
Theres a bit of info on him in Clivers book Disposable. Also a sequence of him kickflipping a snowboard in the Heckler Declaration of Independents book.I remember trying to look him up ono the web a while too - had no luck. Pretty good skater
May 1st, 2007 at 8:38 am
pretty sure he was sponsored by vans for a while
May 1st, 2007 at 9:41 am
i know he was sponsored vans for sure. i saw an vans ad with him sporting massive suite made out of nickles and grinding some rail. that was some heavy stuff. he also skated in prague at one contest and spend whole day in a suit made out of those camouflage nets. kick flipped a pyramid and lost both of his shoes in the air anl landed it clean. out of this world.
May 1st, 2007 at 3:03 pm
I remember seeing an article in Big Brother about him , and also remeber a boxing match between him and somebody else, maybe Karma T., not sure. it’d have to be late 90s i think.
May 1st, 2007 at 3:08 pm
i remember that ad marek ’s talking about. i had that shit up on my wall for ages… it was covered in pennies, though. thinking about how heavy that thing must’ve been. and then thinking about trying to ollie while wearing it hurts my back.
May 1st, 2007 at 4:24 pm
In the mid 90’s he was on an episode of mtv sports and skated on an ironing board. His green tennis shoes matched his hair for a while.
May 1st, 2007 at 4:57 pm
That first clip of him riding a skim board is from a thrasher video called “need for speed” it came out in 1993 I think
May 1st, 2007 at 5:22 pm
I vividly remember an ad with Simon where his head and face was covered in peanut butter, like some kind of hair-do/beard thing. It ran in Big Brother and was actually sort of disturbing. Bet it messed up his complexion… The guy sure could skate. Does he hang with Stephen Baldwin now?
May 2nd, 2007 at 2:22 am
Hey nweyesk8 check out this link it’s all the skate vids Simon’s been in, except they list him as S*m*n W**ds**ck What’s up with that? Was that how he credited himself or are they really that pissed at him? Strange.
May 2nd, 2007 at 5:43 am
thanks, it is funny how some squiggles on the screen can instantly transport one back in time
May 7th, 2007 at 3:01 pm
I had his shoes and hat. I loved Simon Woodstock. I have the Vans poster everyone is talking about. It was a penny suit and the deck was covered in penny’s on the bottom. I have a lot of videos with him in it. He ripped….
May 8th, 2007 at 12:12 am
Word, I had his Vans too, White with Maroon soles.
May 14th, 2007 at 9:06 am
and old skateboard collection card of him http://img413.imageshack.us/img413/5971/simonwoodstockix9.jpg
May 14th, 2007 at 11:56 am
Thanks for the link Jan, I added it to the end of this post. Pretty funny how they list his 1996 ranking. check it out.
June 4th, 2007 at 7:22 pm
the video clip did come from “need for speed”, the second thrasher vid.
June 8th, 2007 at 12:21 am
I remember this dude!
I just put on a 411 Issue #3 and he’s in it doing a “Trick Tip”. He’s basically dressed as a burnout rocker guy wearing a Megadeth shirt and a wig or something. The trick is 360 flip with an additional flip to land darkside. He rides away because hes fixed trucks to the other side of the board.
I remember when he boxed the lead singer for Suicidal Tendancies. He got BEAT UP!.
Dude was pretty impressive in the sense that he skated some unique stuff on crazy boards and actually landed shit.
His jokes were corny and I remember seeing an ad for his own Vans. They were huge and red.
He had a couple of interviews in several magazines but you could tell he was getting burnt out on being somewhat of “the outsider” when it came to the sport.
I remember seeing a video of him 360 flipping a surfboard over a hip. Insane.
that is all.
June 8th, 2007 at 10:08 am
I found this website with some sort of interview from him in 2006, if someone could translate it perhaps?
Link here
July 16th, 2007 at 4:14 pm
Simon is actually my cousin. I just saw him a couple of weeks ago. No He’s not kickin’ it with Stephen Baldwin. The one guy he boxed on mtv was sticky fingaz from onyx. The one guy who got the better of him was like twice his size. Anyways, I’m a lot younger than Simon so I missed a lot of things he did. My dad had the same footsize as Simon, and he would kick him down Airwalks. So i’m pretty sure he was sponsored by them aswell. At one point I sold decks, trucks, wheels, and stickers from my locker at school.
July 17th, 2007 at 12:02 am
Holy crap. Rail blunt?
September 7th, 2007 at 3:47 pm
I don’t know if anyone has mentioned this or not, or if you already knew it, but Simon Woodstock used to skate for Sonic skateboards. They had a deck called suicidal clown, with a clown a holding a balloon gun with a burning circus tent in the background. I wanted that board so bad when I was a kid. Sorry if I’m repeating something.
October 2nd, 2007 at 9:23 pm
Email me personally and I’ll tell you everything you want to know about him…
October 27th, 2007 at 9:21 pm
simon had a tv show “sk8-tv” it came on Nickolonda he skated for sonic he had his own shoe out with vans they where for posers he was a ok skater, but he never took it even a lil serious of cousie you sponcers are goin to get pissed and kick u off the team. while alot of those guys from the early 90’s where learnin tre-flips and hardflips simon was to busy tryin to bust a kickflip on a sulfboard and kinda of got left behind
October 27th, 2007 at 10:59 pm
I don’t think Sk8 TV was Simon’s show. He may have been on it once.
October 31st, 2007 at 7:28 pm
He is mentioned in the new movie “The Man Who Souled The WOrld”
Steve Rocco, creator of World Industries, sued Woodstock for running an ad that was very graphic about Rocoo.
Rocco settled out of court demanding 100,000 dollars and Woodstock to leave and never return to the skateboard industry.
Woodstock has never been seen in skateboarding since.
October 31st, 2007 at 10:41 pm
I met the dude in 93′ or so and he was cool as shit, approachable and not ego vibing like most of the pro skaters of the time. But does anyone even care if he was a nice guy?
Simon Woodstock was an original for sure, but at the same time you could place him somewhere in the pro-skater / clown tradition, a highly rare subspecies that includes lance mountain, harold hunter, mike york and the most recent incarnation, Louie Barletta amongst their own. Interestingly enough he was a san jose-area skater, at least i think so, just like two other skaters on the short list above. All pro skaters who turn christian instantly become unpopular, unless they ride for zero. And simon definitely never rode for zero.
October 31st, 2007 at 10:58 pm
Lance is still popular in my book, and my book aint the “Good Book.”
November 23rd, 2007 at 1:54 pm
I remember an add for GrindKing with Simon,Sad, and Daewon. The first skate mag I ever bought about 15 years ago had a feature interview with him. I was always impressed with his style, riding everything from fishtanks to fender strats, Archery targets to basketball nets. I used to know of a website with a huge photo gallery of him. It’s to bad to find out he’s “in the fold” He was anything but talentless
February 3rd, 2008 at 1:38 am
I remember the 411 tape that Fernando mentioned above. I wanted to put an extra set of trucks on the other side of my board at the time, but it seems like I didn’t have bolts long enough or something…
I think it was him that did a Backflip Kickflip on flat ground. He basically did a normal kickflip, except when he jumped up while his feet were off the board, he did a blackflip in midair and landed it. It was a 8 or 10 photo sequence in Thrasher, I believe, it must have been between 93 and 96, because I got out of skating around 96. I’ve looked everywhere on the net, but I’ve never found anyone else who has done that trick.
February 3rd, 2008 at 10:59 am
Shawn F tells me there are two guys working on kickflips on surfboards.
February 12th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
I remember buying a pair of simon woodstock signature vans shoes on a family trip to florida around 97. I was just getting into skating and bmx at the time and had no idea who he was, the shoes were a little bit like the tnt II vans that are out now but with a less defined stripe on the side, they also featured a stars and stripes hologram on the top of the tongue padding. possibly the best pair of skate shoes i’ve ever had!
February 12th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
This baggy purple pants wearing, low flip tricks bouncing off the ground, Fresh jive/ Raw vibes/ SMP/ era in early 90’s did produce alot of sillyness. It was also a really pivitol time in skateboarding. I remember Woodstock(and Wiess,Bill)were both very CKY before there was CKY. Woodstock boxed “Stickyfingaz” (of Onyx fame)on MTV, not so sure about beating up anyone from Suicidal Tendencies. He did ride for Sonic,Vans, Grindking and Blockhead is the only board company I can recall. I wanna say he was at 1 point on a Rocco co….Blind? I dunno but he would pop up frequently in Big Brother which was a Rocco mag in the begining. He did rip tho,the shit he was doing cracked me up but it was creative, and he had skills. Since we are on it, we need a “where are they now” on the following of that era: Wade Speyer, Jonas Wray, Ocean Howell, Lance Conklin and Andy Roy…tho Birdo told me a few months ago Roy just got outta jail so you can probably guess where he’s at now.
February 23rd, 2008 at 1:02 am
I guarantee you will be seeing some stuff of Simon soon enough.
March 19th, 2008 at 10:50 pm
Simon and i both grew up skateboarding in San Jose, so i spied him a lot. Hed was cocky and i was withdrawn, so i can’t say i ever said more than the occasional “what’s up”, but dammit was he impressive on the 4 wheeler. One of the special ones, for sure. He had a head start, as his mom owned winchester skate shop and let him run it, basically as a toy. It bellied up by the late 80’s, can’t remember if it was hitched to the old winchester skatepark that caballero honed many of his chops at. But yeah, rich kid in trouble syndrome is a common one and he was a poster child from what i could see. Always liked him for being punk rock in an ever mtv/hip-hop threatened subculture, my subculture. Then he became mtv material & we see how that goes. Saw him once, late 80’s, at a contest in santa cruz with a wicked metal hinged knee brace & cane, hobbling around, and it remains my most vivid mental picture of him. But he went deep into some terrible music territory with a canned mtv fake metal rap band for a spell. Then one day he walked into streetlight records, where i worked, sold all his satanic image bearing music stuff and walked off to what i recall being a seminary, to become a cleryman. He was, after all, part of the north SJ Church-ramp crew, which required skaters to sit patiently thru a sermon before partaking in their awesome wooden structures… pretty tempting at a time when skaters were still criminals, not supermodels, and skateparks were a distant memory. I think Jason Adams, & maybe Salman rode that Church scene for a while too. Smart move. Several of those kooks went on to turn pro and expand their talents in a way some of the rest of us were left to only dream about. I hope you’re happy, Simon… and still rolling around once in awhile. -Jason Biggs
March 20th, 2008 at 8:17 am
Jason Biggs, WTF? I didnt know your lame ass skated…you actually got breaks from filming another crappy american pie sequel or ripoff? did you actually fuck shannon elizabeth or did you get fucked by eugene levy?
May 2nd, 2008 at 10:16 pm
I ended up here courtesy of the Google looking for any info on Simon. I used to work for a skateboard wheel manufacturer and worked with Simon on his ill fated wheel company which was being bankrolled by Rich Metiver, who used to run Speed Wheels and Slimeballs and made crazy money on that. Metiver dropped out of it for awhile but started up a new company ( I want to say it was called Union but can’t remember for sure ) and they were just getting started with Woodstock Wheel Co. when Simon did the ad about Rocco (mentioned above) and they both got their butts sued, big time. It was Simon’s deal but Metiver was the only one with any money and that’s who ended up paying. I don’t remember the part about Simon having to leave the industry for good, but that would explain his disappearance.
Simon was a really cool guy who didn’t take himself too seriously, but no mistake, the guy could fucking skate. It was a different era, that’s for sure. Today is so image conscious do one thing that is perceived as being kooky and you’re pretty much hosed for life in today’s skate industry, damaged goods.
June 6th, 2008 at 12:15 pm
Wow, a Simon Woodstock thread. What a trip. I was about 4 years behind Simon, but I totally remember Winchester Skate Shop and all the antics that went down there. His mom was great- just a sweetheart of a lady, who really wanted to hook us neighborhood kids up with the best deal. Simon was kind of a nut. He was always doing some wierd shit in front of the shop. Or coaxing one of the groms to do something stupid for a laugh. One of my sustaining memories of him was him rolling around sportin’ a mohawk and smoking a cigar. But shit, it’s been 20 years or so since then. I think I saw him at the “Skate Church” (as we called it) in ‘91 or 2, but that was the last time I think I ever saw him. I guess he’s heavy into preaching now. Shit, I guess one of us was actually paying attention during the mandatory sermons….
June 15th, 2008 at 11:43 am
I was a good friend of Simons for quite a long time. After the Winchester days he got a job working at another local Skate Shop called Gremic. Gremic was our local hang out and for a long time we hung out with Simon daily. Actually after he got a DUI, I was his ride everywhere for a while.
Let me tell you all about Simon as a person: first things first, all he ever did was to love to make people laugh. He was always laughing himself and would constantly play jokes on people. He was a real genuine guy. I remember when he fucked up his knee bad. It took a toll on him but never brought him down. His whole skating deal was this. He had the best style ever and would pull of anything he tried. It was crazy. But his mark was to be different. So while other people were progressing and pulling new tricks, he’d invent insane shit from old tricks. He loved doing back-side lip- slides and jumping around on the board or pretending to be surfing. He’d always show up to a session with a big smile on his face and would catch the eye of the even most insane skaters. Simon loved his Iron Maiden, Ozzy, and punk. In my 6 years of skating, he was a genuine guy and I am glad to call him a friend. Last time I saw him was about 10 years ago. I was producing a TV show in SF and saw him at the Bammies. He of course was wearing his Penny suit. We talked a lot about skating and life in general. Simon Woodstock is an original.
June 15th, 2008 at 4:05 pm
If I remember correctly, they used to have boxing matches at the Vans Warped Tour. Pound for pound no one could touch him. I think he cleaned the singer from Pennywise’s clock. The Clown deserves respect.
July 9th, 2008 at 10:24 pm
simon woodstock was one of my favorite skaters he had a company called woodstock skateboards and he also spent time skating for vans and airalk and sonic skateboards and anarchy eyewear
July 14th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
I remember Simon Woodstock from some gory but funny “hand in the mixer” ad (I forgot from which company) and from the Laban Pheidias’ skateboard /juggling video from 1996. I guess it was called “Caught Clean” where Simon also got a small part.
August 4th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
For the record, Steve Rocco was a complete hypocritcal prick for that lawsuit BS- what a total baby.
I just watched the man who souled the world- I remember Rocco from the 80’s.. he was a pudgy 3rd rate freestyler that none of us teens at the time really cared about. Obviously, he’s a huge dick and the lawsuit thing proved it to everyone.
The funny thing is, now when I think about Rocco (and I had practically forgotten about the dude) I just think about what a dick he obviously is- and not his has-been freestyling, and definitely not his “contribution” to skateboarding. If anything, he just ushered in an era of dickiness in skating.
Simon should come back- he sounds alot cooler than Rocco.
August 29th, 2008 at 3:45 am
I must say that simon is sort of a role model for me. his style of kateboarding and his creativety is devine! anyone knows how old he is and stuff like that? someone should make a wikipedia site about him!
September 7th, 2008 at 9:39 pm
I actually went to Bible College with him. He’s a class act. What’s amazing about him now is that he rarely talks skating. In fact, he’s very reluctant to talk about it at all. I got to know him pretty good and he never brought up the fact that he was once a world class skater. He’s very humble with that part of his life. It was refreshing to see that. He now does missions trips and helps folks out. Real good guy.
September 11th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
the shoe on shoe off kick flip was kinda a signiture thing of his, as were skating milk crates, having a board flipped by a 3rd party while he was in mid ollie…blah blah blah….he actually had a signiture shoe on vans for a while. i’m sure he thought he was doing skating a huge favour by making it more “accessable”. personally, i just thought he was a bit of a jerk. but then again, i was only just out of Blind oversized peach coloured jeans, so who am i to talk….