Almost, but not entirely like the episode of the Simpsons where Homer gives Marge a bowling ball with his name on it. At least this Justin Bieber themed Mother’s Day gift came with the receipt. Give it up for Hot topic. Boo Ya! Oh snap. Don’t go there.

Not the best picture to show you, but these riser pads are about three inches tall. It’s a result of the quick release lever for the scooter handle. If you see your friends around the corner you can stash the handle in the bushes. This thing spent some time in the rain so I got busted when I couldn’t get it to release. Now I have to hang out with the massive scooter posse that frequents the Battle Ground, Washington skatepark. Seriously, it’s like Florida over there. The scooter kids are teenagers and they have no shame.

Steven Reeves has a video premiere this Friday at Plan B. I haven’t seen anyhting since Bailgun, but that was 2008 (!) I’m sure he hasn’t been dormant since then, aside from appearing on Calling on Colin. Should be good.

Paul Frank’s Julius the monkey dreams about skateboards on the inside cover of the 2008 book Only in Dreams.

Oh Icee bear, who shall remain nameless because it apparently doesn’t actually have a name other than “Polar Bear.” How I love you neo-Igloo Caps type face and your permanently retro identity. You’ve been holding out on me for so long, always on an ice surfboard, and in the past decade, an ice snowboard. Countless are the times that I’ve put a crick in my neck doing a double take while passing an Icee machine, only to find that it was still just a snowboard. I’VE GOT NOTHING AGAINST SNOWBOARDING. I imagine I’d love it if I was still doing it. Talk to me again in a year, my son is dying to go snowboarding on “Mountain Hood.” Icees are perfect on a hot sunny day, so it only makes sense the company is based in a really hot, arid climate like… Ontario, Canada. Huh, there’s no city there.. Oh no, that’s Ontario, California. I thought about lifting this sign from the Icee store at the mall, but the teenager behind the counter was so intent on providing good customer service that she wouldn’t leave me alone long enough to filch it. Turns out you can download a crisp semi-high…

I was at the mall yesterday, accumulated material for at least four posts. I should hang out there more often. There’s like 15 stores dedicated to various aspects of my “lifetsyle.” I got to see an iPad in person. I was dubious at first, but they really are greater than the sum of their parts, ie. an oversized iPhone. The display is really bitching, and it’s hella thin. I say “hella” because I’m overcompensating for the fact that I feel old because I couldn’t figure out how to play Touchgrind on the iPad.

Nissen is a girls clothing brand in Japan. This commercial is airing in Tokyo. That’s all I have to say on the subject, except thanks to Jeff Thompson for the tip.

Smokey Bones Bar & FIre Grill seems completely at odds with the kids menu that John Egertson picked up. There are jiggle girls and bunny suits over on that dot com. Meanwhile, the kid’s menu looks like it was farmed out overseas. Not just the character style, but the text too. Man, what a find this one is though. Its… it’s… perfect.