Because this is picture of an indoor mountain bike park opening up in Portland called Lumberyard. By Kent Dahlgren knows a guy who built it. I’m sure he had help, but kent helped himself to a session and some photos. In some ways so similar to what you expect to see, but in others definitely skewed. Very interesting. I’d love to see some of these interactions between planes in a concrete skatepark.

If you’re a model or a regular gal posing for a photographer’s portfolio, it’s only a matter of time before someone sticks a skateboard in you hands. Hey, you’re casual, radical, and fashionable. These photos were both brought to my attention by MC, so you can guess what his web surfing habits are like… Up top: Valerie Van Der Graaf photographed by? These pictures are i a few places on the Interwebs™, but I can’t find a credit for them so here’s a random link. Bottom: From the portfolio of Shannon Lee Miller, as seen on White Zine.

Skate Bench #1 on sale for $255(!) Which is $75 off! Originally part of a kickstarter campaign. Looks pretty cool, but the price is hard to swallow. Videos after the jump. Fancy pics at Kem Studio.

From the Onion, truly America’s greatest news source. I heard a piece about the Onion on NPR’s This American Life. As interesting as it was, it kind of sucked the joy out of it a little. Reminded me of a science fiction story I read where scientists analyzed humor and discovered the actual cause of what made people laugh, at which point nothing was funny to anyone, anywhere, anymore. What was the name of that story? Anyone? [Source: Westway]

I was checking out a 7″ cover of the 720 soundtrack released by a band called Metronome the City, trying to track down an original that wasn’t on eBay, and of course I stumbled on a bunch of other time wasting distractions. Ahh… Interwebs™. Let me count the ways that I love you.

The same guys that brought you the Board of Awesome, an electric skateboard controlled by a Microsoft’s Kinect hack, are back with the Board of Imagination which uses brainpower instead of body gestures to make the skateboard go. Both are interesting exercises. You might think the second one was much more of a scientific leap, but you can buy brain powered toys at Target and whatnot. If you’re going to power your skateboard with electricity, you might as well wear headgear instead of carrying the remote. I almost ran over a guy on an electric skateboard a couple weeks ago. He was moving kinda fast and was unexpected. But then again, it might have had something to do with my California stop. – Thanks to everyone who sent them both in.

I used to be a regular at Uncle Fun (Not the name of a N.A.M.B.L.A chapter…) when I lived in Chicago, so when I was back over the holidays I decided to drop by for another visit. I did find a box of disappearing ink that has what looks like a very constipated young man inappropriately squirting ink at the chest what first glance looks to be a similarly aged young girl, but upon closer inspection may actually be dude. You are welcome for the blurry cell phone pics. Very welcome. You will thank me when I get a damned new phone. They are expensive, so I may need to get a damned new (Steve) Job(s).

MattyCollector.com reports that Mattel is going to release a hoverboard of sorts… Details are slim. It apparently “glides over most surfaces,” whatever that means. So is it just a slippery board or does it have wheels hidden inside it that aren’t visible from the top Finally! This totally awesome 1:1 replica of the hover board from the BTTF 2 and BTTF 3 films includes multiple whooshing sounds and will glide over most surfaces (does not actually “hover” – check back in 2015 for that feature). We’ll be taking orders for it March 1 – March 20, 2012, and the final product will be shipped around November/December 2012. Because this is such a high-cost item, there will be a minimum number of orders required to go into production. If we don’t receive the minimum orders, won’t go into production and customers will not be charged. The price will be announced later this month. (Note: Hover board does not work on water.) Also, what’s up with the name Matty Collector? It’s Mattel’s weak attempt at branding a web site aimed at adult collectors. Really? That’s what you came up with. Horrible web site on top of that. Poorly organized. Meh… Photo is…

Like French Maid TV before it, Eye Handy is a flimsy excuse to show scantily clad women pretending to show you how to do some menial task that you already know how to do anyway. Or as it may be in this case, something you possibly don’t want to know how to do, like putting carpeting on your longboard. Expect lingering shots and “accidental” framing of certain areas of interest. – Thanks to Matthijs for the tip.

Rad Applique. What the hell is MC doing hanging out at Michaels? Ok Patch Adams, that’s enough.