American Hero or Skater Traitor?
August 25th, 2008 by Heath

“Only a fool has a pool and keeps it full. Only a traitor doesn’t drain his pool.” US Bombs, “Jaks”

Ryan Lochte recently obtained two gold and two bronze medals in the 2008 Beijing Olympics for his swimming. He even set a world record for the 200 meter backstroke.  However, the Olympic trials in July were in question for him due to an injured ankle acquired while (skateboarding) dropping from the deck of his house, as noted by the folks at Yahoo!Sports.

-Thanks Sarib for the tip

Previously, Lochte had shown up to events with the telltale road rash of a skateboarder, which has caused a commotion amongst his coaches and peers. He recently told reporters that the New York Times that he would love to skate the Great Wall of China, but his coaches forbid him from packing his board.

According to the folks at silverfishlongboarding.com, Lochte rides a Sector 9 trilam, and was also seen riding a “trick board.”

All of this recent information about this athlete begs the question: Is Lochte a true core skater? Would a true skater allow himself to SWIM in a swimming pool? A solid slasher over the deathbox of an Olympic grade pool seems like a challenge worthy of a gold medal. Or does he even care, as he signed a lucrative seven figure endorsement contract with Speedo? Does he laugh to the bank, or skate one?

17 Responses to “American Hero or Skater Traitor?”

  1. kvon Says:

    True, no skater has a filled pool… but it would be nice to hop in the drink to cool off after a hot session… how about two pools! I would settle for a nice drained right hand kidney and a water hose.

  2. egbert Says:

    The only true Trilam is a Tri Lambda. They’re not a skateboard, they’re nerds… U.N. Jefferson would be ashamed.

  3. Kilwag Says:

    Everyone, say hello to Heath.

  4. Seth Says:

    I guess we will just have to see. He will have plenty of $ now to donate a skatepark to the town of his choosing. If he does, put him back into the ‘win’ category.

  5. Seth Says:

    oh, and hello heath

  6. benny b bones Says:

    Tony Hawks pool is full, I saw it on his 411. Is he a true skater?

  7. dave Says:

    “Only a fool has a pool and keeps it full. Only a traitor doesn’t drain his pool.” US Bombs, “45 m.p.h.” Actually those lyrics are from the song “JAKS”

  8. Heath Says:

    Thanks, Dave. I changed it over.

  9. Larry Says:

    how bout one full and one empty with a spine connecting the two, so you could miller flip over and land in the drink, and practice your breast stroke on your stripper girlfriend.

  10. kvon Says:

    Hello Heath!

  11. Dan Hughes Says:

    Steve [his father] said. “But he wouldn’t be the swimmer he is today if you took (his freedom) away from him. We’ve butted heads before about it, but that’s what makes him who he is.”

  12. Ryan Heckler Says:

    damn swim punks….

  13. Bjjpdx Says:

    Maybe he is Posing as a skater to better “Scope” out ridable terrain. Although he missed the perfect opportunity to drain and skate the olympic pool after hours. I hope he doesnt skate in his speedos though.

  14. t-roy Says:

    Mike Swim.

  15. sane Says:

    swim? what is this “swim” you speak of?

  16. damienhialation Says:

    I guess the real question would be how much money would someone have to pay you to fill up your favorite park with water and have you swim across it? If you say there is no amount than you LIE!

  17. spk Says:

    swim is the thing someone do it before empty the pool using speedos.

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