I got an email alert about the grand opening of Sarasota’s Payne Park next Saturday. I got excited because my mother in-law lives in Sarasota and so I visit it on a regular basis. The existing skate park is fun, but nothing to write home about, so a little variety would be nice. It turns out that Sarasota isn’t getting another skatepark, it’s just phase two of the surrounding park facilities, which includes amphitheater, more tennis courts, a walking path (Whee!) and a “skateboard clubhouse,” whatever that means. Then I read that the skatepark fees would be waived for the day of the opening festivities and I really got mad. Sarasota has one of the highest concentrations of wealth in the southeastern US, but you have to pay to skate at that park. The land for the park? Donated outright. The construction costs? Paid for by a one percent sales tax. Public tennis courts? I think they are free, but for some reason, a facility that can be used kids from all demographics is pay-to-play. Absurd! It’s already annoying that the damn thing isn’t open on holidays or during school hours! I don’t know what the hell this “skateboard clubhouse” is supposed to be, but I’m guessing it’s part of the reason you have to pay to skate. Guess what Mayor Palmer, kids don’t want or need a skateboard clubhouse. It isn’t 1974 and Kristy McNichol isn’t going to show up. Kids (and a lot of adults) just want a place where they can for free without the bullshit of memberships and restrictive time constraints. Free skateparks open dawn to dusk? The rest of the country seems to be catching on, why not Sarasota? To top it off, it turns out they closed the entire skatepark for the month of August so they could build the rest of the park. That’s third of the time in the year when the park is open for semi-reasonable hours. Way to go geniuses. You can’t possibly even pretend to have the best interests of the Sarasota youth in mind.

Eww.. gross. Get your mind out of the gutter. Joining Blake Nelson’s Paranoid Park is Nick Hornby’s Slam. You might recognize Nick Hornby as the writer whose books get made into good movies like High Fidelity. Slam’s protagonist is skateboarding obsessed and regularly holds imaginary conversations with Tony Hawk who answers in not always relevant quotations from his autobiography. Sounds like an amusing premise actually, if it weren’t written for young adults. Actually, if you can enjoy Harry Potter, why not Slam?. It’s interesting to note (OK, maybe not) that Tony Hawk is so pervasive that his status as a cultural icon can now be a bit supporting character in books much like Elvis was in the movie True Romance. Hornby’s had a few of his books made into successful movies, so maybe we’ll see a Tony Hawk cameo that’s a little better than what he did in Thrashin. While it’s unclear whether or not royalties were paid to the old 80’s wrist guard company of the same name (Haw!), it is clear that skateboarding is a hot topic for those trying to sell to the young adult market. Speaking of being in the market for young adults (what is this Perez Hilton?) the Gus Van Sant adapted Paranoid Park for a movie before it was even properly published. We heard rumors that Paranoid Park the movie was doing well overseas, but we haven’t heard squat about it in the states, or even in Portland where the damned thing was filmed. Hornby’s Slam comes out on October 16th, and for some reason the cover on the US version is skateboard-free while the UK version is what is shown above. There’s a spoiler heavy review of Slam at The Guardian.

Ignition TV has recent (I assume) footage from the grand opening of the Mission Valley YMCA’s new (to them) vert ramp. A bunch of vert dogs were there, Bucky Elastic, Bony Hawk, the French Canadians… There were other people present on deck but they didn’t make the cut, perhaps due to space limitations. Although posted on Metacafe, the clip’s producer is Ignition TV, who is the, uh, leader in action sports fro you mobile phone. You can chose by sport and brand on their web site, so you know that’s Extreme™! Mission Valley’s vert ramp was donated to them by the X-Games. We had one of those X-Games retired ramps in a suburb of Portland for a while, where it mostly sat as a platform for kids to practice flip tricks off of the flat bottom onto the cement. There was a small community of vert riders who would session a couple times of week and chase the kids off the flat. Ask MC about it. They banded together to meet and talk with the park district to ensure and volunteer upkeep, but the district wasn’t interested. As more and more concrete parks opened out here, the already underutilized vert ramp saw less and less use. It eventually started to rot, and so it was removed. Now, if you want to skate a vert ramp you need to go to California. The New York Times has an article about how most of the X-Games competitors and vert enthusiasts in the US tend to live in one area of California. If you think it’s all old men, SignOnSanDiego.com has an article about the aging base of X-Games competitors and a young up and comer named Alex Perelson. [Source: Skate Daily] If you still need to get your vert fix, you can watch the video after the jump. Those guys are doing some amazing things, but to the general skateboarding population they are kind of like the freestyle skaters of the 80’s – most people wonder why they bother to still have contests.

Looks like it’s all poured, some curing concrete under that plastic. Fence work in progress. Click here to see it bigger, Neil, you shouldn’t look, you’ll just get riled. Crappy little Tualatin is just down the road.

Day three: Professional Skateboard Simulator for the Commodore 64, from 1988.

Yeah, Commodore 64 again. Noticing a trend? It looks like they Photoshopped (well it was 1988 so MacPainted) Jeff Kendall’s face onto a guy skating a Mark Gonzales board on vert. They used to run the occasional pic of the Gonz on vert, this might have been copied from one of those. Actually, the guy has a Read and Destroy sticker on his helmet, so it’s likely lifted straight form the pages of R.A.D.. UK readers, help a brother out. I heard that the new Pro Skateboard Simulator 10 (Ryan Sheckler edition) has a level where you practice running out of the arena crying if you don’t win first place.

No, this isn’t the start of a recurring feature, just a reference to the fact that we had a similar post last friday. Adult film stars are kind of like pro wrestlers sometimes, they need to have a gimmick to distinguish themselves from the rest of the competitors. Keeani Lei lists skateboarding and surfing among her other uhm, talents. I first got, err, turned on to her via a Sleestak post, but they got it from the NSFW Slap Magazine forums. Come to think of it, Slap sounds like some sort of a fetish magazine. In any case, Keeani does indeed skate and appears to enjoy it. She’s into flyouts, women, Jason Jesse re-issues and you know… other things. I like the shot where she’s pretending to drink OJ’s out of a juice pitcher, a visual pun that would be lost on anyone who didn’t skate. Reminds me of some of the 80’s skateboard advertising. She’s really going for the niche market. There’s safe for work video after the jump.

Tim Hubbard sent in a link to more Dunedin opening day pics. Thats Josh Black inverted, and an unknown rider carving over some very chunky stairs. Tim also included a link to Punk On Board which is a mish mash of Florida skateboarding, punk rock and art both past and present. The linka are all over the place, and seem to be in conjunction with another site called Art Gone Bad. It’s not the easiest thing to navigate, but just keep clicking. There are snapshots from a Skateboarder Magazine photo session at a backyard ramp, a weird looking life size paper mache mosh pit circa 82, Mike Weed freestyle action, Monty Nolder at Grigley’s ramp, vintage McGill, backstage at the Warped Tour with Anti Flag and the Buzzcocks, Joan Jett looking tuff as nails and all kinds of good stuff if you dig around for it. If I lived in Florida I’d be hanging out with this guy, provided I was punk enough.