EA’s upcoming skateboarding video game called Skate (Duh!) is being heralded as a Tony Hawk killer. Not the actual Tony Hawk, but his video game franchise… The idea that it will kill the franchise is slim to none. It could easily be better than the latest version of the Hawk-named game, but they’ll still milk make a few more because It’s firmly entrenched by now. This seems like a good a time as any to bring up Thrasher’s Skate and Destroy game, that unexpectedly fizzled. I mean, what a perfect product tie-in. The game was a good one too. It took a different approach from an art direction standpoint, going for a more stylized look than trying to emulate realism. They had a decent development studio behind it too. Maybe they were a little bit too early. Oh well, I guess everything Fausto touched couldn’t turn to gold. I had kind of stopped collecting and chronicling current skateboarding video game commercials. They are just too prevalent now. This new one for Skate is pretty good though. It’s funny and features some name skaters acting on camera, and doing a good job of it too. The gist of it is that…

A seemingly drunk or otherwise incapacitated Jamie Kennedy interviewed Tony Hawk and his game developer at E3, which is to video games what an eBay convention would be like for skateboard collectors. Jamie is clearly phoning in his performance and bombing, but it’s still pretty funny to watch him take the piss out of all the video game geeks. Also amusing is when Tony Hawk realizes he’s in a bullshit situation and turns it back on Jamie a little. Watch the vid (only if you are bored) after the jump. And while we’re doing video games and skateboarding, if you are truly bored, you can also see a picture of a board someone painstakingly painted with a character from the Legend of Zelda. [Source: Gametrailers.com via Best Week Ever]

The July 1st issue of Bicycle Retailer and Industry News reports that Tony Hawk has inked a deal for a signature bike line with a company called Dynacraft. Tony Hawk will be joining Dynacraft’s illustrious lineup of brands that include Hot Wheels and Barbie. You can buy these performance machines at such fine cycling outfitters as Amazon.com and Target. What’s that? concerned about the quality? Not to worry, according to Bicycle Retailer and Industry News Tony Hawk bikes will be completely different than anything Dynacraft has distributed in the past,” said John Bisges, managing director at Dynacraft. “They will have higher end components, updated frames and the most cutting edge graphics ever. We are all extremely excited about this new bike line, and are certain it will be a big hit when we showcase it to customers at this year’s Interbike show.” The line will be available in retail stores beginning in spring 2008. I’m placing bets that Tony Hawk bicycles will likely be a BMX facsimile. Maybe we can expect a Matt Hoffman to start hawking toy skateboards in retaliation. Get a closeup of some previous Dynacraft “cutting edge graphics” after the jump. Update: Not just one bike line,…

Never mind the questionable corporate merchandising tie-in and issues of sweat-shop assembly, this Lightning McQueen child’s skateboard looks just the right size for your toddler skateboarder. But the thing barely turns and is really slow. We learned why when dad swapped out the wheels, Hey! Those aren’t bearings at all! They just molded some plastic into a rough precision-bearing shape. I suppose it’s a good thing that the wheels and bearings could be replaced, the reproduction was accurate enough for that. What do you want for $25 right? Dang, those Disney marketing folks are such assholes!

$150 will buy you one out of 500 Screaming Hand figures made world wide. They must have had some hardcore economists genius, or wizards if you will, figure out the intersection of supply, demand, and price to give the highest profit potential. I’d imagine they could sell a lot more than 500 if they priced it for mere mortals and not hipster lowbrow art speculators. Jim Phillips deserves to get paid for sure, but it would be nice to allow working class fans the chance to appreciate art as well. You can preorder yours now from Garage Works. Then again you can pay a mere $100 for one of these. [Tip off: Doogantown from Old Man Army]

Over the years I’ve met and spoken with some interesting people that I otherwise wouldn’t have a chance to, were it not for Skate and Annoy. Sometimes I search them out, sometimes they find me. We’ve got a gallery of 70’s skateboard bubblegum trading card stickers, and what better excuse to bring it up than some correspondence with the Jesse Crumb, son of legendary 70’s underground art icon R. Crumb. Jesse runs the official R. Crumb web site, as well as being an artist in his own right. Here’s part of what he had to say: MAN! I have been looking for those cards/decals for 30 years, at least. I grew up in Northern Cal., near Ukiah. There were a few of us into injuring ourselves. A piece of gravel could throw you 10 feet, as you know anyway. So at the local corner store these cards arrived, but in very short supply, and they were COVETED. One guy who got a pack was a really feral kid, parents were complete hippies. My folks were back to the landers, but some of them.. MAN..the kids were just..ON THEIR OWN at, you know 7 years old?? Jeezis.. ANYWAY..So..he climbs the rope…

I was going to title this post “It’s reigning Jesus” or “It’s raining (religious) men” but instead I used a quote from an article in the Anchorage Press titled “Excuse me while I kiss the sky.” It’s a heartwarming tale of an 18 year old kid in Anchorage who is fighting the Alaskan weather and racial prejudice on journey to become a professional skateboarder. Sounds like a Hallmark movie. Oh yeah, the whole point of this post is Stephen Baldwin in Russia (!?!) holding a religious-themed skateboard [Source: Perez Hilton] and even better, (Is that possible?) a series of Jesus action figures engaged in Extreme!™ sports, not to mention panhandling (?!) , bull-riding, and in army fatigues(!!?!?!). All this plus a Jesus in skateboarding roundup, or hoedown, if you will, after the jump.

Orezona pointed this out in response to my post about the Hot Topperz plastic mohawk helmet decoration. He says helmet flair is the new pink. I wonder what he means by that? &Sane Helmet Spikes

Here in the Pacific Northwest we have a chain called Fred Meyer. It’s a combined supermarket and department store: food, clothes, plants, hardware, electronics, film processing, pharmacy and sporting goods. I had a good laugh in the sporting goods section one morning. Did you know Flowboards were being sold under the Kryptonics label? Get yours for $60. $19.99 completes! I actually picked up a couple of those plastic helmet mohawks because they once came to me in a vision.

Because I waste my time not skateboarding by writing about skateboarding instead of playing video games, I was unaware of this 2004(!) game called TrackMania that lets players create and race on their own Extreme™! tracks. Not all of them are skateboard inspired, but this one sure is. Watch the video after the jump.