I’ve looked at the website (www.halfpipehoneyz.com) but I still can’t figure out what it is or why. It appears to be a site for slutty models who can be booked for events. But it also has skatepark reviews. The latest one gives the Cocoa Beach, Florida park 4 out of 5 stars, and it’s obvioulsy written by a skater. WTF? They even have merchandise (including yoga pants, seen after the jump) and stickers. Anyone have the lowdown on this?

Retarded UK video game magazine Edge declares Danny Way better than Tony Hawk. Well, at least it does in a short magazine graphic. The article is about an upcoming Danny Way video game called “Skate” which is also supposed to be Better than Tony Hawk.

Ah the good old days. Remember that time when Heath Ledger threw all those surf boards at a young Tony Alva? It makes me want to move into a condo. Fortunately, the landlord of the locally famous building that housed the Zephyr Surf shop wants to see it developed into a mixed use facility; Strip malls and condos for everyone! Predictably, Jay Adams (ne De Mornay) mother Rebecca is leading a pack of whiny hippies that say the building is the heart and sole of Santa Monica. Yeah, and so is Huey Lewis when it comes to rock and roll.

What week of the year is this? Someone comment us the 411, would ya? This is the part of the story where we start giving you a weekly recap of news links including those that didn’t warrant their own full post. Dull dull dull. I know. Some of it is interesting, I swear.

While not quite as sexy as harassing congressional pages, The Mayor of Harpenden (UK) is under investigation for allegedly harassing and threatened a 13-year-old boy over noise level disputes caused by an allegedly crappy driveway skateboard ramp. I think they call it a car park over there. UK readers, a little help? The inmate numbers in the picture above were added by us, as an editorial statement. I don’t to get sued by a gaggle of flouncy barristers in their funny wigs.

Council meeting begins, ends with skateboard issues seems innocuous right? Well, some business owners in Bradford County Florida are butting heads with local skateboarders, with one incident culminating in a fake barfing display. Ahh… what a gold mine. First off, there is the obvious comedy value in fake vomit, reminiscent of the scene in Repo Man where the old lady yells at Otto to pick up the trash can he just drove into. You pick it up! Could this just be civil disobedience in the face of the quagmire of red tape bogging down the local skatepark planning process? We can only hope so. Slightly more disturbing is nuisance tax proposed by the offended businesses who want to legislate the wearing of helmet and pads so that more fines could be levied against skaters. Read how an unruly teenager put the Annoy in Skate and Annoy after the jump, plus more fake vomit than you ever knew existed.

Skateboarding as a school activity has been done before I think. The article at deseretnews.com is pretty standard, with the exception that the program was instigated by 60 year old man who had just learned to skate from a former student who now owns the company Skate Pass LLC. I’m not sure how much actual skating the teacher is doing, so we’ll take that with a grain of salt. The succinct title of this post is a quote from a 5th grade girl in the program.

I quote from the press release: “In the 80’s there was no bigger skateboard company than Powell Peralta. . . . One of the key factors to Powell’s dominance as a skateboard powerhouse were the ground-breaking graphics. Using extremely dark and detailed hand drawn image of skulls, snakes and dragons, PP was the first skate/street company to throw such taboo images into the mainstream. . . . Today designer Danny Drake has teamed up with George Powell to reissue a collection of 8 of the most memorable graphics in skate history on updated bodies. These PP items are an extremely limited edition and are only available in “The Rail” at Nordstom”.

Maxtor makes hard drives. Kids these days with their Myspaces and digital cameras and the pirate MP3s need a place to store all their Interweb desktops. Maxtor thinks they can sell them a networked storage drive. They’ve created a web site with a fake family to show off the product. The daughter’s name is Tirin, and she has a dream (other than a real name) and that is to make her own skateboarding website…” Hey Tirin, as this site will prove, any jackass can download Wordpress and make one for free. Duh. I swear I’ll make a real skateboarding post soon.

Updated: Instead of just tipping my hat to EPM’s post on Suicidal Tendencies’ Institutionalized video, I decided to turn it up to 11. The vid caps above are from no less than three four different Institutionalized appearances on video: The straight video, a Beavis and Butthead appearance, a fake live appearance in a club on Miami Vice!, and the video for Institutionalized 93 – the remake. More vid caps and links to the vids after the jump.