Let’s compare the progress of the motorized toy skateboard to the motorized toy helicopter. Vertibird debuted in the early 70’s. I’m guessing the first battery powered tethered controller skateboard was around the time. Today you can buy a radio controlled helicopter that will fly indoor and unfettered for less than $50. The only advancement made in RC skateboards is the ability to play girlie punk-lite music from the controller. You’ll still be spinning 360’s and popping wheelies, albiet Fashion Flippin’ ones. In favor of Vertibirds: Pretend to be on a Coast Guard rescue, police patrol, or Nasa spaceship recovery mission. 30 years later with the Bratz you can pretend to be a tarted up teenage prostitute on a skateboard. Check out the commercial and more after the jump.

Nothing much much funny I can write about cervical cancer. Here’s a commercial for a vaccination program using Gardasil. It features a female skater. Looks like she’s not using a stunt double. Hard to tell, the skating shots are at a distance. Anyone know this girl? Oh wait, I’ve got it. We’re glad to be able to provide this public health cervix to our female readers. Hold on, hold on! For all you female Clash fans, this is a public cervix announcement… with guitars!

Here’s some footage as shown on CNN of that kid in Charleston South Carolina getting pushed off his skateboard by a security guard. Nice form on that ollie to nose manual. Somebody sponsor that kid. The newscaster’s voiceover is amusing itself. “I think that’s called grinding. Well grind this buddy!” Classic. Watch the incident with bonus footage of the whiny taser kid being interviewed after the jump.

“It’s like skating across my face and down my heart,” said U.S. Air Force veteran Quincy Collins. OK, that quote is kind of funny. However, in a case of life imitating video games, or as we like to call it Idiots imitating idiots, some skateboarders have “vandalized” a Viet Nam Veterans Memorial. Not the one in D.C., but the local one in Charlotte North Carolina. I say vandalized in quotes because the extent of the damage appears to be limited to dusty tire tracks. So while it might not be traditional defacement, it’s still very lame, and not too bright. If they ever get caught, I’m willing to bet that these rebels will claim they were inspired by Tony Hawk’s Project 8 video game. Watch the incriminating video and more after the jump.

This is just something that makes Shmack stand out from the competition. Check these pants that come packaged in this Nike SB style shoe box. These jeans feature Shmacks sneaker protector on the cufs of the pants to keep your jeans from ruining your kicks. And to put it the package over the top there are 2 gold Shmack sneaker tabs (the things that go on your laces, like the AF1s). And for those of you who skate we got some limited edition Shmack skate decks. CJ says you should get one and see him at the skate park. I’ll never win any fashion awards, and I’ve worn some stupid stuff in the past, but you’ve got a vanity problem if you are worried about your jeans somehow ruining your shoes. Dare I say, it makes you seem a bit feminine? Shmack is making a skateboard too, but it must be for posing since actually skating would definitely ruin your kicks. Does anyone know about this? Not our scene for sure. Ask CJ if you see him at the skatepark. Shmack makes a lot of 80’s style hip hop clothing as well as hoodies with a break away mask for…

It’s good to see that skateboarding on gravel is finally catching on. This picture is part of a feature called Day in Pictures from the international version of the BBC News. You can see it larger here, but you’ll have to manually select picture number 5 once you get there. More skateboarding in Iraq after the jump.

Anyone who read Thrasher in the 80’s should remember references to the Capitola Classic downhill race series. They covered it when it was going, and pined for it when it wasn’t. It seemed there was always a Capitola rumor in On Board Trash. Of course, seeing as how my own front yard ramp got mentioned there once, they pretty much printed anything. Rumors be damned! Former competitor and second place women’s finisher Judi Oyama is doing her best to resurrect the Capitola Classic. She’s in talks with the city to try and bring it back. Not bad for someone who got uninvited to the race for being a chick. Judi has two recent appearances in local news concerning the Capitola Classic and getting the new generation, and especially women involved with their own scene. The poster is Jim Phillips design from the 1980 race and the picture is by Judi’s father. More Capitola links after the jump.

This should really be part 1 I think. This is probably the first car as skateboard commercial I ever saw back in 2006, but I was unable to record it until now. This Jeep is so bad ass that it causes a ball of rolling jumk to follow until it spontaneously assembles into a robot and proceeds to ride the car like a skateboard. Automobile manufacturers are ever safety conscious, and so is the robot. He takes the time to rip a dome off the top of a nearby building to wear as a helmet. Quite frightening, actually. I wouldn’t want to have to worry about property damage suits everytime I drove my car. Watch the video and learn about the robot’s old schoool roots after the jump.

Brands that can’t be stopped. Apparently Debbie Does Dallas, “a well known 1978 porn franchise playing off the sexploitation of the Dallas Cowboys football team cheerleaders” has been remade several times. The title phrase is so catchy even people who have never seen the film know the title. Give me alliteration or give me death. Likewise Shepard Fairey’s iconic use of the word Obey and the Powell Peralta Ripper graphic by V. Courtlandt Johnson are part of the popular consciousness. Not sure what the picture on the right has to do with the movie. but there they were together on the internet with that coopted skateboarding t-shirt design.

There are lot’s of large skateboards, but only one title holder. Tod Swank has his work cut out for him running all that is Tumyeto without having to worry about people trying to take away his record for the world’s biggest skateboard. First there was that cheater (Update: Not a cheater) in Australia, Now there are a bunch of eggheads at Bay College who are building a 31 foot large skateboard as part of a project in a Computer Aided Design class. A student named Tim Timler (Seriously?) is the project lead. Tim, you suck. Tod didn’t need no stinking computers. The college president who is admittedly not a “balance person” is going to be one of the riders in the documentation attempt. Fantastic! [Source: Daily Press, Escanaba, MI]