In Stan Lee Presents – The Condor, Tony Valdez loses his parents and the use of his legs. Then, with the help of robotic legs and nanobots from the family business, he turns from professional skateboarder into the skateboarding crimefighter known as the Condor. The reviews for this straight to DVD release are not good. It already aired on Cartoon Network at least once, but you can watch it for free on Hulu while it lasts or rent it from YouTube. It’s horrible, unintentionally funny, and the main character is almost totally unlikeable. 10 minutes into the plot, the publisher of the “biggest extreme sports magazine” invites Tony to spend the night so she can make him a superstar. There’s quite a bit of PG-13 sexual innuendo, micro short skirts and heaving cleavage, but the overall quality of the animation, story and voice acting is so poor that it’s only going to appeal to a much younger, somewhat confused audience.

During the finale of Men in Blazers they aired a TV commercial for the Mini Cooper Countryman featuring Tony Hawk hauling his kids out to a waterpark in the middle of the desert. While trying to find the commercial online saw that he had ditched Jeep and signed some sort of extended agreement with Mini USA last year, appearing in several videos. And thanks to longtime contributor Matthijs, I also had some pictures of a weird MINI Skater, which is small skateboard with a built in strap binding produced by the Mini Cooper parent company some time around 2002. And just when you thought you couldn’t get enough MINI skateboard action, MINI released some augmented reality glasses that pair with your MINI to provide enhanced safety and visibility. I am not making this up! Whenever there’s a need to illustrate dangerous pedestrian (no driving) behavior, you can bet you’ll find a skateboard or two, and even a dog.

Bow before my arcane knowledge of useless skateboard related information. This Valterra Rad-isaurus looks suspiciously similar to Denver the Last Dinosaur. Both appear to be released in 1988, although I can’t tell for sure about the Valterra board, the copyright is hard to read. They both appear to be the similar species, and they both wear mohawks and sunglasses, but only the Rad-isaurus has pants. Denver is obscene! Won’t someone please think of the children? Follow me dear readers, and we will tackle the question that archeologists have been pondering for decades: “What happens when a group of pop-a-wheely, BMXer, fun-loving, skateboarding, and rock-music-listening contemporary kids open an ancient dinosaur egg?”

Oggy and the Cockroaches is a French cartoon that sometimes airs on the Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network channel here in the US. It’s not very good from a writing/directing standpoint but it occasionally has a good gag. There’s an episode called “Skate Fever” from season 4 that features what may be the first ever appearance of fnigerboarding in a cartoon. The cockroaches have glued the cat onto a skateboard, and are following him around as he crashes into things. They make a quick detour into a toy store to pick up cockroach sized skateboards from a giant pile of fingerboards on display. As a whole, the cartoon is pretty heavy handed, lots of gratuitous TNT and slapstick cartoon violence that isn’t set up very well, but there are a few good gags and the art direction is occasionally interesting. The first episode supposedly aired in 1998, so that would date Skate Fever (episode 54) to about 2002 or so. The skateboard that Oggy finds belongs to a pro named “Roller Dude,” and it features a nose bone, which is interesting, at least if you’re the kind of skate nerd who is used to visiting Skate and Annoy… Check out a…

Bart Simpson rides a skateboard. Yes that’s the oldest of skateboarding in pop culture news, but this shot of Krusty the Clown jumping Springfield Gorge is a major scoop. I don’t think you understand the magnitude of this discovery people! I’m starting my Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech tonight! Bonus Simpsons detritus after the jump, including DVDs and fingerboards.

Last nights episode Dark Purple was the second appearance of skateboarding in Adventure Time. It’s kind of interesting that both times it’s been Jake the Dog skating and not Finn the Human. This time Jake has safety equipment of a sort, it’s still made out of his own flesh. Cartoon Network must have caught some flak the last time he skated without pads and a helmet. Jake busts some new school and old school moves. The graffiti on the bottom of Jake’s deck is spot on satire of rebellious youth culture. No Way! Indeed.

At some point after I bought this Ben 10 action figure, opened it and left is sitting around the house, my kids decided the board needed to be colored in with a green marker. Fair enough I guess. I don’t think this show is on anymore, not even in reruns currently. Ben’s skateboard is actually a hoverboard. In the series, he rides it around occasionally, but in the tradition of making surfboard and hoverboard action toys, wheels have been added.

I hope everyone gets the skateboard they asked for for Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza, or whatever you celebrate. This is a still from a short sequence in a new animated Christmas special called Elf: Buddy’s Musical Christmas.

Empty, anxiety, surprise, encouragement. All of these emotions can be found in these Eurosport station identity spots from 2011. You can watch just the skateboarding bit, but if you have a bit of time to kill you might enjoy some of the overly enthusiastic, awkward english voiceovers featured in the behind the scenes clip. It’s almost like watching an english language release of a Japanese cartoon, except filled with marketing talk. – Thanks to Matthijs for the tip.

I probably should have saved this for a Monday. (At least you’re not this guy…) [Source: Perez Hilton] – Thanks to Mrs. Kilwag for the tip.