I hate martinis, actually. Except on one occasion I had some chocolate martinis that were good. Real good. I like liquor in the form of girlie drinks. Cosmos, lemon drops, anything sweet. I wish I could say I had a few in me when I bought this “vintage” cocktail napkin off eBay. It was staring at me. Mocking me. If iwas in AA it would be mocktail-ing me. Still, it was a $2 “buy it now.” Right now there’s an unopened pack of 16 for $13. It says right in the damn listing that “This package of napkins is very collectible.” So it has to be. I mean, I collected one, so they aren’t exactly lying. I’d like to think this vintage napkin was of the vintage from when the office Christmas party was a punchline for a gag involving some poor schmuck with a lampshade over his head, and that would mean 60’s or 70’s if I had my druthers. Coincidentally, that was about the last time someone used the phrase “if I had my druthers.”
14 comments
Seth
http://theskateboardmag.com/blogs/j-grant-brittain/2009/12/25/happy-holiday/
Mottrock
When my Grandmother past away back in ’89 I found a few boxes of these in her basement when we were cleaning out her house. I’ve been giving them away as gifts over the years, and now I only have 2 left.
skaterhusseindave
My version of the martini involved cheap gin and Mountain Dew, a high caffeine content being necessary to keep me awake long enough to appreciate the psychedelic effects of the gin..
In my perfect world I wouldn’t be allergic to alcohol and could come to your office party without ending up in a lampshade…
kilwag
I don’t even know what’s in a martini, I mean, you just told me… but really it was just an excuse to reference to the Reverend Horton Heat.
In a perfect world, I would be serving drinks at the Skate and Annoy office x-mas party on a gross of these napkins purchased off eBay. As soon as I get Colin selling those ads…
skaterhusseindave
It’s only a martini if it’s gin with a splash of vermouth, and should be garnished with an olive. Your evil elf has what looks like a maraschino cherry with a holly leaf and doesn’t appear to be drinking just yet. He still has all his clothing…
kilwag
That skateboard is like a coffee table with wheels.
Estes' Ghost
I’d order a dozen Bacon Martini’s right now!
jakeandannoy
Good. Don’t ever question my manhood tit’s. They are my manhood tits and I’ve grown them throughout my manhood and they are big healthy tits. Now, “that’s juicy”!
Prickly Pete
Jake, we never questioned your manhood. “Tits”.
jakeandannoy
Thank you, dgp. Wasn’t my fault I’ve had too much caffeine and I was disoriented.
dgp
voila is better than “that’s juicy”
jakeandannoy
Tits. Interesting take on Santa’s “handlebar” mustache.
Randy you did the right thing only buying the one,take it to a kinko’s color copier or scan it ad voila! You can make your own 16 pk of em’. Jesus, what straight guy sez “voila”? Not as bad as “druthers” I guess…
dgp
i know more guys than girls that drink cosmos!
Rich
Ha, nice post. Sounds like there might be a need for EA, Ebay Anonymous. Don’t forget Santacon downtown on Dec. 19th. Probably see some poor schmuck in a Santa suit skating along with a lampshade over their head. Ho, ho, ho.