Hey everyone! Choke on these pictures of Pier Park, opening tomorrow, and then don’t ever, ever come here to skate it please. There’s nothing to see here. Move along.

I’ve looked at the website (www.halfpipehoneyz.com) but I still can’t figure out what it is or why. It appears to be a site for slutty models who can be booked for events. But it also has skatepark reviews. The latest one gives the Cocoa Beach, Florida park 4 out of 5 stars, and it’s obvioulsy written by a skater. WTF? They even have merchandise (including yoga pants, seen after the jump) and stickers. Anyone have the lowdown on this?

It’s Will Powers in the oft neglected D.O.S. bowl circa late 2004. Someone said they were resurfacing it. Anyone know if that’s true? I’d consult the web site but it looks like they haven’t updated it in a couple of years.

Retarded UK video game magazine Edge declares Danny Way better than Tony Hawk. Well, at least it does in a short magazine graphic. The article is about an upcoming Danny Way video game called “Skate” which is also supposed to be Better than Tony Hawk.

Ah the good old days. Remember that time when Heath Ledger threw all those surf boards at a young Tony Alva? It makes me want to move into a condo. Fortunately, the landlord of the locally famous building that housed the Zephyr Surf shop wants to see it developed into a mixed use facility; Strip malls and condos for everyone! Predictably, Jay Adams (ne De Mornay) mother Rebecca is leading a pack of whiny hippies that say the building is the heart and sole of Santa Monica. Yeah, and so is Huey Lewis when it comes to rock and roll.

Hey PDX locals, has anyone seen Jason lately? Sifting through some pics I came across this 2003 shot of him in his living room which he converted into a ramp. I haven’t seen him in a while. Over a year actually. More pics after the jump.

I don’t know who first said “I don’t know art but I know what I like.”, but I like it when someone manages to get the money to build something skateable and pass it off for art. Apparently Dreamland feels the same way. Matt Sefton (See Newcastle feature) contributes another piece, this time a short bit about an art show at the Baltic Centre for Contemporary Art in Gateshead England called Spank the Monkey. At this point there are no skate pictures up at either site, so you’re better off checking out Matt’s pics here on SnA.

Handsome Dick Manitoba – What a great name for a guy fronting a band with the also great name of The Dictators. The impending death of CBGB’s is all over the web now. I’ve been ignoring most of it, but hey, how can I not post a pic of the Dictators who helped start the CBGB’s, especially when Handsome Dick is featured in the Restaurants section of New York Magazine, and The Dictators are playing the second to last show at CBGB’s. Photo by Delissa Santos, poached from New York Magazine.

Just cause the park opens this weekend doesn’t mean you can rest on your laurels or ass, for that matter. Head on over to Skaters for Portland Skateboards and buy a Pier Park commemorative shirt, silkscreened poster, or a skateboard to help raise money to put a roof over the damn thing. It is in Portland you know. Hello… Oregon? Winter rain? Did that ever cross your mind?

Because a day without a post is lame. So here are some mediocre shots I took in 2004 at a sparsely attended non-test at Burnside.