What does it take to be a Pro Skater?

My kid got this Pro Skaters action figure for X-mas from an unaffiliated third party – a non-relative, non-skateboarder. “Rodney Stone” has magnets on his feet, and is supposed to be the most articulated Exteme!™ action figure. I don’t have a lot of Exteme!™ action figures to compare him to, but the others must be really stiff since most of Rodney’s articulation is concentrated on the way his feet rotate in circles around his ankle joints. Rodney couldn’t bend over to pick up his board if his little plastic life depended on it. Check him out, he’s on the “Vert Team” according to his jump ramp. He’s also a fan of big air.

Pro Skaters action figure

Here’s Rodney looking about as articulated as he can get. He’s still rocking the fingerless gloves that must be NOS from the 80’s.

Seriously, who is Rodney Stone? There are plenty of pros I haven’t heard about, and nowadays pros are a dime a dozen. People often complain that a lot of the so-called pros don’t deserve pro status, but I think this guy might be the first “pro” to ever be a figment of someone’s imagination. Wait, wait, not true. There are at least two other fake pros with skateboard models I can think of, which is today’s trivia question. Can you name them?

I’m not exactly sure what the dust buster accessory is for. Sweeping off the ramp?

Apparently, the flat picture of a grind rail qualifies as a “skate park piece” that you are supposed somehow actively use.

Ah, Rodney’s stat sheet. I see he’s sponsored by… the brand of toy that makes his action figure.

The dust buster attaches magnetically to his back, but is not strong enough to hold him by.

Bitchin simulated Blind graphics. In the attempt to make Rodney Stone the most articulated Extreme!™ action figure, something had to give, namely all articulation on the skateboard. Gaze on the glorious single piece molded trucks and non-spinning wheels.

I tried to make it look like a frontside rock, but his feet would only stay attached in this position.

I obviously was enjoying this photo session too much.

Errrr…. WTF?