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Skate and Annoy: Daily

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Klamath Falls Irrigation Ditches

Yeah, I’m from Klamath Falls. I know it is hard to believe that a man of my magnitude and exception hails from such a small podunk town. But that isn’t the subject of this article. The subject of this article are these irrigation ditches that lay in the ground some 10, or so, miles outside of town

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You see, these ditches carry water during the summer, so our local farming community can get water to their fields. That’s about as much as I can tell you about irrigation…that, and moving pipe when you are 14 years old for $0.10/piece, in the sun with mosquitos swarming around you, sucks. Anyway, on this day, the fat roller turds that run the KFalls park had it locked up for some moisture issues, so I was left to my own devices. Street skating in Klamath Falls is kind of burnt, especially so when it’s sort of wet out. After driving around for about 45 minutes I eventually found a dry manual pad and some plywood, to make a wallride, at the local Community College. After finishing there I decided to head on out down highway 38 (that’s how you say that in KFalls). After about 8 miles I made a right on Old Midland Road. About half a mile down, here were these old ditches, running both ways under the road.

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They are probably a good 6′ deep, steep, with maybe 4′ of flat if you’re lucky. I remember trying to skate them when I was 14, and that experience pretty much sucked. However, I remembered seeing them a couple of years ago and it seemed that some sections were redone by the county. Needless to say, there was ice, water, and probably 18 different forms of animal feces in the bottom, so no attempt at even trying to skate these bohemoths occurred. So I took some pictures and remembered how much trying to skate these things sucked when I was 14. Ah, the good old days.
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12 comments.  

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12 comments

  • blanket party

    problem #2 w/ the k-falls park… there’s NOTHING there for the local street kids to skate, so they really don’t care about it anyway.

    think about it-would any of you dudes on here drive three hours to skate tualitin? to those kids, it’s the same thing. too faraway, and there’s nothing there that they wanna ride.

  • # 1 problem with the K-falls skatepark: location, location, location. They put it in a fooking sports complex run by a kook who hates skateboarders. It was doomed from the start. If it’s to be saved, then the local skaters really need to rally, maybe get all the southern oregon skaters from Ashland, Medford, Talent, Grants Pass, etc. to help out. I don’t really know what’s been done so far since I live in Portland and make it down there once a year if I’m lucky, but the fact that it’s been taken over by a fookiing roller rink tells me that the locals didn’t do much or they were completely powerless to stop it. It’s a sad situation to say the least. It seems that the mentality of the local powers that be is pretty fooked. If they are unwilling to listen to their own community I doubt that they’re open minded enough to listen to some out-of-towners.

  • I got tired of getting mad about the park situation last summer. It is what it is. I’m sure the locals have tried, but the City is probably not hearing any of it. I seriously think it is now a moot point, sadly enough. My point I was making before is that maybe looking into some DIY projects around town might bring together like minds into building some interesting and creative things, without having some nanny looking over your shoulder, while bringing together the local skate community. Maybe this could allow mobilization, which could then lead to action on the park situation. If you go in May, be sure not to try skating on a non-Holiday weekday, since they don’t open until 1pm. Oh, and be sure to bring your $1.

  • jeff kendal

    “Abandon” like a pussy, give up like a little girl. There’s already 23,000 square feet bought and paid for. I’m fighting here and now. And I’m not pouring CHIT when there’s a DREAMLAND Facility already there.
    I have to say, I think it’s up to all of us who skate to fight for that park. You know, one man down there got the right people to come down and build it, and built in my opinion the sickest F IN park in Oergon.
    K falls has the best. Newberg is still awesome, Lincoln city will surpass KF, but for speed, flow, transfers, oh did I say SPEED, You can’t beat it, except for speed Hailey, Idaho is pretty scary.
    So even though I sit in a chair, resting my big phat toe, I say we all need to fight for any skatepark built in Oregon. If there’s a problem, we’re not pussies and most of us make pretty good money we can tell the bitch we got to go save a park and go down there in numbers and show them the money that’s coming from out of town and who we are, because I know I pay a PHUCK load in state taxes. We have a right, even though we don’t live there, Let’s do it.
    I say we should head down every Memorial Day weekend and beautify the park with shade trees, park benches, cement patch for the cracks, and laquer for the poo coping.
    Come ON! Do you think po dunk, poor ass, white, brown, and black people give a shiiite about that park. FFFFFFF NO! It’s up to us who skate to take care of that park, EVEN though we live somewhere else. It’s a park GOD DAMN IT!!!
    Or should we be like california and destroy all the cool shiIIITT that’s built… Or like the SEVEN Acient wonders of the world except the Pyramids of Egypt, let it get destroyed.
    The number of skaters are too small, they need outside reinforcments and we’re big boys now, phuckin Joe Bob ain’t pushing me around.
    Those few skaters that are there are our brothers in need, don’t puss out. Let’s ban together Memorial Day weekend. NO, I’m not saying show up with PBR’s, bongs, needles, and glass dicks. No, I say show up with the old lady, maybe your kids and fight for this PHUCKER.
    Have a blast, bar b que, rally for a free park built by skaters for skaters.
    And last but not least, THE SKATESHOPS in that town can go UP to Enumclaw, Washinton and get HORSE phucked on a animal farm. Remember kids, bestiality is still legel in Washington.
    Thanks for letting me vent and rally, I’m serious about memorial day. We should all have no problem giving support where it’s needed. Expecially, for something I know we all love.
    Skateboarding.

  • Actually, I don’t live there, I’m from there. And during Holidays, I visit there. I definitely don’t consider it MY RESPONSIBILITY to fight for the park. Let the KF skaters and skateshops deal with it. If they can’t get things done, when they are directly involved, then they should abandon it and start building their own thing. There is an abundance of land, where a hole could be dug and concrete poured. The town is essentially falling apart in places, so adding some concrete to a wall there, or to make a bump here, would more than likely go under the radar. Basically, what I’m saying is, you shouldn’t feel sorry for me, feel sorry for the skaters that live there and aren’t doing scat to get their scene going. That’s their problem, not mine.

  • You heard the man, take it back. If necessary, get your politics on and mobilize to get rid of the jackass politicians who turned the management of the park over to a private party in the first place.

  • jeff kendal

    I have no simpathy for you, or anyone who stays in that town to skate. You obviously have one of the single greatest skateparks in the world and what do you do? You let phat ass, dirt bike ridin, dicks take over the park. Grow some balls and take that park back. I say “by any means neccessary” Or you can always drive down 60 miles to WEED. They have a small grindline park or keep on truckin to Anderson or Sac. Granted, not Dreamland built but it sure beats a stupid ditch. I skate stupid stuff myself(molalla, st. helens, anything in Eugene you get the picture?) stupid stuff is fun for about one boneless and maybe and ollie. Yeah, this phat phuck ollies and has a little boneless. Piss on skateland roller rink. “Mad as hell and I’m not going to take it any more”

  • Derby works well with about 4 feet of flat…

  • What would optimum flat bottom distance be for a ditch?

  • A ditch park would be bitchin. You could incorporate wallrides, curbs, ledges, tranny, brick, dead rats, etc… Seriously though, that would be cool. Do kind of a Derby thing, but with more bells and whistles.

  • A

    Those look tight (no slang) but possibly fun. I wonder if they are ever dry. I’d like to have a good big ditch session. There’s talk of making one of Portland’s next parks a ditch-like spectacle.

    And welcome back!

  • Anyone up for a Manure Banked Slalom Race? LOL! Just kidding.

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