kinder

Cannibal Kinder Surprise

Kinder Joy Surprise toy found inside little chocolate eggs, for sale by a cannibal in Hong Kong. I’m clearly phoning it in today. Bonus Kinder Surprise after the jump.

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jellyskaterdude

Amorphous Jelly Babies Skater Dude

On it’s own, I might not post this guy, unless I already had him in my possession. But something about his amorphous presence is a little disturbing, like some alien sent down to take notes and gradually assimilate and absorb the skateboarding populace into his undulating mass, until he grew to the size of the Stay-Puff marshmallow man. Then there’s the trictionary on the back of the box, often completely wrong or not actually showing the trick it describes. His arm is a lever that opens his backpack for storing Bassett’s Jelly Babies. Very sinister. There’s no date on this, but judging by the board and the description of the item as “vintage” I’m guessing it’s late 90’s or early 00’s. Get yours here.

– Thanks to David ODK for the tip.

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sonic-crackerjack

Sonic the Hedgehog Cracker Jack

A Sonic the Hedgehog Cracker Jack toy promotion for Sonic Hedgehog 3, circa 1994.

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stylin

Stylin’ Skateboards

I had more than a handful of these “Stylin’ Skateboards” from Topps. The first time I saw them was in ’91 or ’92. I think it was B-Rad who showed it to me first, and it blew my mind. I asked where he found it, expecting it to be something a friend brought back from a trip to Japan or some kitschy novelty shop in New York. Instead, he nodded his head over his shoulder towards the Wall Mart at his back in a semi rural (at the time) Steamboat Springs, Colorado. This sales sheets shows them packaged in little boxes, but the ones I saw came in sealed plastic bags with heat-pressed seams. Each bag came with some crappy candy sugar wads pressed into the vague shape of a skateboard wheel, though more likely just generic pellet molds. Also in the package, a really crappy plastic fingerboard made out of soft plastic. I believe you had to snap the wheels in place yourself. The second generation fingerboards (more on that later) were fun for a few minutes, but the real reason to keep buying these things was for the paper stickers that came with them, each a slightly mutated version of what someone in Topps marketing thought represented skateboarding culture. Lots of “rad dudes” and cow skulls, like Life’s a Beach meets Zorlac, but turned into a Nickelodeon cartoon for kids. I think these things sold for a dollar and change each. A while back I saw an unopened case up for bid, but they wanted something in the neighborhood of $100 for it. Second generation fingerboards? Yes. Slightly more maneuverable than the hard, keychain versions that first appeared in the 80’s, you know, the kind that featured paper graphics in a clear shell. Stylin’ Skateboards were at the opposite end of the brittle spectrum. The loose tolerances of the truck and wheel assemblies combined with the soft plastic made for the first fingerboards that you could more or less turn instead of just sliding. The larger size was more to scale as well, but ultimately the cheap plastic was too soft to get any meaningful use out of a toy version of… well, a larger toy. Somewhere in my basement I have at least one of these unopened. One day I’ll dig it up.

Nestle gelatin jumble

Translucent, colorless, flavorless

Ahhhh, the extent that Nestle will go to trying to sell you horse hooves and cow muscles. It’s called “Bon Parj Jumble” and this commercial is for the Russian market, or at least was done by a Russian agency. Director Alberto Accettulli must like skateboards, as he also directed a commercial for Nike SB. Who knew Michael Cera (above, left) was on the stunt team?

– Thanks to David Leclerc for the tip.

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soft-n-fruity

Highly unlikley

It’s highly unlikely that this Swell brand gum is either, soft, fruity, or “swell,” given that it dates back to early 80’s. Unbelievably, the starting bid on a box of antique gum is $125. You can get an unopened box of skateboarding trading cards from roughly the same era for about quarter of that. I can’t tell exactly what is going on here, this kid is possibly puking fruit into big glass of soda. Big box after the jump.

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Bite me

An in store promo item for the Bart Simpsons Butterfinger campaign. Sure, it’s old, but Bart Simpson never goes out of style. It’s too bad that show went off the air… Wait? It’s still on? It’s too bad that show is still on the air. I actually haven’t watched it lately. It went through a phase when they clearly should have called it quits, and then it got good again, but I couldn’t get into it again. I’m more of a Bob’s Burgers guy these days. Get some.

Botan Rice Candy, 3.4 oz

Botan Rice Candy comes with a free sticker, this one courtesy of MC’s offspring. Even larger after the jump. The sticker, not the offspring.

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Chicks love nerds

Fathers day gift from my offspring. I also got Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots, which look just like they used to. However, they have replaced the head mechanism with cheaper innards that make a barely audible noise when triggered, depriving today’s youth and one middle aged dad of one of the main joys of playing the game.

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December 2nd

American GI

May - June 2015 - 68 items

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Grover's Video Korner #100
Burnside Halloween 2015

Grover's Video Korner

Annoying Kid of the Month
Generic Segway at the skatepark

Annoying Kid of the Month

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