The Man Comes Down on You

Skate Harassment

In the immortal words of Squirrel Bait, I don’t need no pig stomping on my buzz.

The rollerblading cop is from some sort of gay French rollerblading event.

From the 10-11-06 Contra Cost Times – Pleasant Hill California
Skateboarding ban approved Pleasant Hill council cites risk of injury, damage to walls and public fixtures in effort to limit use in crowded areas

Pleasant Hill city officials hope that new skateboarding restrictions will prevent the little wheels from having free reign of the city. The City Council voted unanimously Oct. 2 to approve modifying the established bicycle ordinance to include skateboards and further restrict the use of both within the city’s commercial areas. Skateboarding had never before been addressed by the city.

America, land of restrictions!

From the 10-14-06 Kennebec Journal – Kennebec Maine:
Skateboard traffic cause for sidewalk concern

I am a resident of Winthrop with a concern for the safety of the pedestrians that walk the sidewalks of Main Street. This includes store owners, the elderly, children with their parents and also dog walkers. The problem I see lately is the constant riding of skateboards on the sidewalks. This activity begins when school is dismissed until the hours of 9 to 10 at night. I often wonder where the parents are of these children. As a child growing up, we were never allowed to play until homework was completed, and you were in by sundown, which was usually 7 p.m. Please help me with this situation.
Barbara Behrle-Winthrop

Classic “Those damn kids!” She’s at least 50 years old if she’s a day old.

From the 10-16-06 Lawrence Journal-World – Lawrence Kansas:
KU student seeks skateboard option City commissioners will be asked to deny a request by a Kansas University student who wants the university to loosen its restrictions regarding skateboarding on campus.

The city’s Traffic Safety Commission unanimously recommended denial of the request after hearing from leaders in KU’s public safety department that allowing skateboarding on campus could increase the risk for injury accidents or property damage. KU student Casey Millstein had asked for the change so students would have another transportation option.

I hope Casey has his ducks in a row. That town has gone to hell since William Burroughs passed away.

From ThisIsBradford.Co.Uk – Bradford England:
Skateboarding teenager fined £330 A teenager has been landed with a £330 fine and £148 costs after becoming the first person to be prosecuted for skateboarding in Bradford city centre.

“I think it’s over the top, but I suppose they are trying to make an example of someone so they chose me. I did ride straight in front of two wardens because I did not know they were there. That was a bad idea.” He said: “It’s a lot of money for me to pay for a hobby. If they are going to clamp down on us, they need to give us somewhere else to go. We need a park in the centre.”

How much is £478? Why 899.786 USD according to this site. Well, I think that’s an appropriate fine for using a skateboard as a mode of transportation, don’t you?

And finally, some good news

From the 10-16-06 Lebanon Daily News – Lebanon Pennsylvania:
Don’t look down on skateboard crowd I live in Lebanon County, but I understand that skateboarding has become a source of debate in many communities around the world. By far, the greatest majority of these kids never have and never will commit any crime.

Private homeowners who put up “No skateboarding” signs on public sidewalks are simply making a statement of hatred to these impressionable kids. We homeowners have to maintain our sidewalks for public use, but we can’t put limits on who the public is. If such regulations are enforceable, then I could put up a sign in front of my house that says “No urinating dogs” or “No strollers with crying babies.”

I couldn’t have put it any better. Wait a second! Are private home owners actually putting up signs that say “No Skateboarding” in front of their sidewalks? Unbelievable!


  1. The powers that be wants you sitting in front of your TV only getting up to go to your computer to buy stuff you saw on TV.

    Is a rollerblading cop preferable to a fat-assed-doughnut-eating cop? I’m having a hard time deciding.

  2. Squirrel Bait was fucking awesome…you are a true Mid-Westerner Gawlik…I’m gonna go spin “Skag Heaven” right now thank you very much…

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